Sunday, July 5, 2009

I am a liar, but at least I am providing a public service.

Yes, I am a liar.

I figured I might want to clear the air with that before I wrote an actual post.

I am fully aware I said I was going to post Monday, Wednesday and Friday of every week. I am fully aware that I lied about this.

It happens.

I also get easily distracted by lots of things.

Moving on:


I understand he died. Yes. It's sad. Boo hoo.

Now that we have that moment over, I'd like to ask everyone to GET OVER IT!

If I hear one more cry of "MJ COME BACK TO US BAAAAAAAAAAAAW" or another utterance of "MJ isn't really dead. He's with Elvis", I think I might give myself a surprise tracheotomy.

Except I don't know how it would be a surprise, considering I would know I was doing it. Well, it could be a surprise if I suddenly gained a split personality and had my other self stab this self in the trachea.

I am thinking too much into this matter.

Seriously, everyone, calm the hell down about MJ. There is a whole bunch of other stuff going on in the world besides his death. Seriously guys. Iran is still there. Their problems didn't just go away because Michael Jackson died. Let's get back to the issues of the world. It's not like his death should blind us from that fact.


Oh my God.

This is all a plot to make Americans unaware of world matters. Seriously. That's why Michael Jackson is "dead". He was like, 500 bajilion dollars in debt when he died. I bet you the government paid him to die and cause a huge media frenzy on EVERY TV SHOW EVER so we would forget about everything else in the world! And then he would be out of debt and Obama could be all "anti-christ" and do whatever he wants! YAH!


I hope you all realize how retarded that sounds. Consider this post a public service to the world. I know, I'm too kind.

Feel free to shower me with praise.


Amilayne said...

billy mays dying is way more tragic *nods* Q.Q

Subatomic Tomato said...


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